Absent-mindedness

I had an incredibly interesting day this past Thursday. Quick back story: I own an Infiniti G35 that has a built-in GPS navigation system. However, I own an external Garmin GPS that was used in my previous car. The Garmin was being stored in the center console of my Infiniti. I got my car detailed on Thursday. When it was returned to me a few hours later, the Garmin was missing. I instantly started freaking out. I quickly checked around my apartment and could not find it, so I called the owner of the Detail Shop. I told him about the situation and asked for a refund and said I would file a police report if I did not get one. He said he checked the shop and even his employee’s own car, and found nothing. The last time I had seen the GPS was in my car a few days earlier, but my memory about the GPS since then was fuzzy. I still felt confident my GPS was stolen.

Later that day, I went to a nearby track to run laps with 2 of my close friends. About 15 minutes after leaving the track, I realized that my cell phone was missing. Luckily, a guy walking his dog at the track found it and answered it. We got it from him shortly thereafter. This development made me severely question my judgment about the GPS. If I am this absent-minded, should I really be throwing around theft accusations? I have not called back the Detail Shop owner since then. I am completely baffled as to what the best decision is in this situation.

I’m in a breakeven stretch over the past 2-3 weeks. I haven’t struggled like this since February. I had started taking for granted the fact that I was always cranking out low variance results (in spite of only averaging about 20K hands a month). This stretch has been a harsh wake-up. I tend to get a little depressed when poker is going badly. The way I’ve tried combating depression this time around is to make an extra effort to do other things in life I enjoy. Going out, playing video games, watching movies I’ve been meaning to see for a while.

Time management

I have a huge problem with time management. I've create lists of the tasks I need to accomplish in the near future, but struggle to completely them in an efficient and timely manner. Hours of each day are wasted doing things that bring little benefit to my life. I need to start pushing out these wasteful periods of my day. The first step I've made is blocking myself from being able to access Facebook indefinitely. I should also halt myself from using AIM, as I feel that I waste way too much time making small talk on it.

I have come to the realization that so much of your time during the day is spent with simple maintenance. Hygiene, eating, cleaning your house, buying groceries, making basic income. These activities are simply done in order to maintain a basic condition and rhythm. They don't enhance your life from what it was in the recent past. Most of the things we do in life are not with intentions of progress, but just maintenance. The struggle becomes trying to maximize time spent making progression in life. I tell myself I care so much about self-improvement within various areas of my life. However, this requires hard work that allows little time to relax.

I have been running bad at 5/10 in particular the past week or so, and it is extremely frustrating. I have decided to buy out of both bets I made for poker results this month (one with WOW UR BAD, and one with Jethro). I have not been this frustrated about poker in over 6 months, even though I am still up a couple thousand on the month. There is nothing worse for an online cash player to run well at their lower stakes (2/4 and 3/6 for me), but run badly at their higher games.

Yes, I'm still alive

-I'm going to stop apologizing for my lack of blog updates. I was starting to feel guilty for it, but I now realize that blogging will only be enjoyable for me if I don't look at it as a chore or duty. I really enjoy expressing myself, but I don't wanna force myself to make half-assed entries with little substance. I used to criticize my friends who became lazy with blogging, but I realize it is not my place to do so.

-I'm sure a lot of you have been reading Raptor's blog lately. For those who don't, he is a top internet player who has kind of transformed himself lately. He has started a sudden focus on dieting, exercising a lot, trying new activities such as yoga. While I don't strongly associate myself with him, the changes he is trying to go through resemble my own. The past year or so, I've become very interested in self-improvement. I constantly try to find out what I don't like about myself, and figure out how I can change it. I also try to make a consistent effort to try new things, everything from learning the basics of Buddhism to keeping an open mind about new sports. Right now, it has been about trying to life a "healthy" lifestyle where I'm pursuing goals that reflect what I believe everyone needs to maximize happiness. Exercising, eating well, getting consistent sleep, etc. I believe that there is a good life equilibrium that we are still trying to figure out, but I'm trying my best to move closer to it.

-I defended my FTOPS HU title on Sunday. There were 1300+ entrants, a large increase from the 512 from last year. Full Tilt decided to allow byes this time, which is really lame. I ended up having to play a first round match, while the majority of entrants received a bye. I ended up winning my first 3 matches, but going down in the 4th round. I had a lot of fun and believe that the format is perfect for me. It is the one tournament that I get really excited about. I probably put more effort into the FTOPS HU event than any other single day of poker. In related news, my custom gold football jersey came in the mail for my FTOPS win. It is an authentic-style jersey. I plan on getting it custom framed and hanging it up in my apartment, as its a really cool way of displaying one of my big poker accomplishments.

-My trash talking in chat boxes needs to come to a halt. I am very courteous to fish, but against competent players I am often a dick. I don't know why I do it, must be some kind of insecurity issue. I had a friend of mine call me classless the other day, and it was a bit of a wake-up call. I've also come to the realization that my trash talking is probably -EV. It does occasionally put people on tilt, but the more common result is that it makes me focus more on the chat than the actual match. It also makes me steam a lot. If you catch me talking shit from now on during the middle of an actual match and show me proof, I will transfer you $10.

-My results in poker have continued to be very solid. I ran really well at 5/10 heads-up to start, but have come a little bit back down to earth. I definitely feel comfortable making 5/10 one of my regular games now. It has been necessary to do this. There has been a large influx of regs at mid-stakes HU lately, making it more difficult to get soft games. Attached are my results for July... better to post them later than never. In the mean time, I have quite a lot of hands I need to grind for the rest of August to qualify for our August $$$ bet. GOGOGOGOGO

Live pokers, and getting back on the horse

Yet again, sorry for the lack of updates.

Last weekend, I made a trip to the Atlantic City area to scope out the beach and play some poker at Borgata. My live winning streak is finally over, as I lost $1350 over 9 hours of play. In spite of being stuck, I was enjoying myself during the sessions. I'm very happy to know that I can supplement my online play with live poker, and actually enjoy doing it. Many online players seem to be miserable about live poker. Anyway, here is one hand where I totally owned someone:

First orbit at the table, I limp AJs UTG. (I have no idea what is standard here, if anything.) The guy behind me also limps, and the player after him raises to $50. It folded back around me, and I decided to call. The limper behind me also called. The flop comes J73 rainbow. Check, check, the PFR bets out $80 into a $150 pot. I decide that he likely has a small pair here and see no point in raising, so I call. The other limper folds. The turn comes a 5. I check, the PFR bets $80 again. This seems like obvious weakness to me. I'm trying to figure out how to extract the most value, and I decide to flat and donk the river. I call, and the pot is now $470. I donk $250 on the river just to milk him a little. To my extreme surprise, he pretty quickly raises it to $650. I have no idea what to think here... rivered two pair/set is the only thing that makes sense at all. I take about 3-4 minutes just sitting there, completely borderline on what to do. Suddenly, the guy offers to show one card. I say sure, and he flips up the top card, a 7. Three seconds later, I announce call, flip my hand up, and he mucks. I don't normally make live reads like this, but I felt very confident that him showing a 7 was a sign of weakness. Who said that online donks can't make live reads?

As for online, I've finally started grinding again. I took about a week off, which is probably my longest hiatus from poker in about 2 years. I think that being around poker players 24/7 in Vegas burned me out a little bit, but I've found my groove again. I've played 4K hands in the past 2 days. I'm running pretty badly at 3/6 NL, but hot at my occasional 5/10 shots, so I cant complain.

I have a bet set up already with my friend WOW UR BAD for next month. We're making a bet on who can make the most money at 2/4+ NL next month. The qualifier is you have to play at least 30K hands in order to win the bet. We believe that this bet is +EV for both of us, since we're both generally lazy about putting hands in. He probably has a slight edge since his results at MSNL HU are ungodly, but I plan to put up a good fight.

Reflection

I'm now back home. I've been doing a lot of reflecting on the past month that I spent living in Las Vegas.

Going into Vegas, I was concerned about "making the most" of the trip. I made lists of activities I wanted to accomplish. In hindsight, I am glad I did this. Seeing progress in my life is important to me. Right now, I believe there are so many things in this world I've yet to experience. Setting black-and-white goals helps me to clearly see progress. I didn't end up doing every single activity I brainstormed, but I did most of it, and I feel satisfied. The trip has made me very enthusiastic about experiencing new places. Most of my housemates had a lot more traveling experience than me, and I now want to change that about myself. I see myself going to make different locations over the next few years.

During my second week in Vegas, I wished that my housemates had more of an enthusiasm to go out and "experience" Vegas, rather than relax around the house. By the final few days, however, Jethro and cntgetmedown were likely wishing the same of me. I had grown homesick during the tail end of the trip. Vegas is so fast, and it's hard for many people to take in large doses.

On my flight home, I realized that I missed my housemates already. Corny, I know. It was great to have a group of friends in which we all have a common interest, and helped us to bond easily. I feel that we executed the entire plan of the house well. I really hope I get to see these guys again, even if not in the same setting next time.

Now that I'm back home, I'm going to finally play through Metal Gear Solid 4. I love the MGS series because it challenges me intellectually. This aspect obviously does not exist in many video games. Woven into the plot of each game are important philosophical topics. The ongoing evolution of our species; the purpose (if any) of our lives; the best government system and how one can truly measure what that is. The creator of the series is a complete genius. Each time the next installment in the series is released, I become enthralled in a video game for the first time in years.